Inasmuch as this closeness can be advantageous in proferring solutions to peculiar problems, peer influence also come handy with some deleterious effects. Thus, the need to learn to say no to such negative influences.
The first thing to do in this regard is to be able to know what is good and what is bad. Yes, you would say every adult or teenager should naturally know what is good from bad. I wouldn't argue much with that fact too but you must also remember that decision making is a complex integrated process involving both the logical aspect and the non-logical components, most notably, your emotions.
So even after knowing fully well that something is not going to be called good after you may have done it, the next step is to say no to it. But bearing in mind that the person persuading you to indulge is someone you wouldn't want to offend, you are faced with a difficult or more biased decision-making problem.
Other times, you easily see the benefits as they will present them in the most interesting way ever. You can't turn down the hand of someone who knows how best you like the tea served, you know?
However, it is not totally impossible. That is why there is need to educated peers of any age to understand their role in decision making and the need for them to be firm and assertive.
First, I must say that for reading through this post up till this point, you are already armed with some level of resistance to peer influence. This is possible because you have now been told again that there are negative peer influences. This knowledge will stimulate you to be more watchful for any influence that comes your way.
On the other hand, it prepares you to be strong and resist every negative advances.
Staying strong is a conscious decision. You should be ready to lose friends, money and other benefits if you truly want to be able to overcome. That is the truth, not everything is genuine and if you must avoid every non-genuine thing you must be ready to lose some.
Also define your boundaries. Set boundaries for yourself. You cannot allow everything come into your space. This must be deliberate and firmly decided because without setting your boundaries, anyone can easily infiltrate you.
One important word that indicates boundaries setting is 'discipline'. This may be a seen as the ability to control one's time, money, actions, or events in a way that they are not controlled by these things.
This can be a difficult thing to do anyway but the williness to work on any indiscipline would surely become productive someday.
Another thing that will be useful is to have someone that can advise you on certain decisions. This must be based on trust and the person must be someone who is more experienced, advanced or as the case may be, older, than you. This is to ensure that you are forewarned of the likely consequences of every negative action you are about to carry out.
The major challenge to this is that young people are usually reluctant to make a more elderly person their advicer because they feel they are going to be restricted from enjoying their youth to the fullness. This may stem from the belief that young people often think the older people do not understand.
That may be true to some extent but I bet there are more than a ton of older people who are ready to come down to your level to understand and bear with you. In their wisdom, they would later educate you on the consequences and/or benefits of every action you present to them.
Most times they will leave you to decide yourself. But is is often clear that wish and push you subtly to choose the better option, which may seem like the worse to you anyway.
Let me stop here for now. I hope to write more on this topic another time but one thing you must not forget is that it is better to make the right choice today and feel defeated than to make the wrong choice now only to feel miserable all through your life after.
I hope you stay strong to say no to negativities and more importantly, I hope you realise the negativities in the first place. In overcoming peer pressure you can never go wrong in these few ways.
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