The Scriptures says that Christ first loved us. That love that is not even earned. As we men are foolish, we pursue what our eyes pleasure in and refuse to fall back on someone who first love us.

Unearned love is the most beautiful type of love. That which is pure and would never put burden on us. All we need to make it perfect is just to respond. Many women only have what I call induced love for us. You remember the many proving, wooing, gifting, explanation, paparazzi and finally she says, let me give it a thought. That thought is a well calculated thought. In her head, she is like, "Well, I do not love him, but he can take care of me, after all, Hampo that I am in love with doesn't even have my time." So she accepts not because of love but for secondary reasons. 

Some men could be lucky that as children start coming, she begins to love you. But not many are that lucky. She still thinks about her first love. If you think I am telling a lie, ask your wife but promise her you wouldn't take any offence.

This explains why it seems she does not respect you though she might fear that you would beat her and all that, does not love your friends, suspect you, finds it difficult to forgive you, or even sleep with your friends to pay you back for a hurt done to her. That is why she hides her money, allows you handle the bills alone, keeps secret accounts, make investment in her name, speak to her family member in secret or languages you would not understand. That is why she complains that you are one minute man without trying to provide solution too. That is why she will divorce you at the slightest provocation. 

To live longer therefore, we must learn how to love the woman who first loves us. These types are more patient with us, transparent, loyal, forgiving, understanding, generous, and many other beautiful virtues. These types do not need Eri (meaning ancestors in Isoko dialect) to be faithful. They just can't see themselves been touched by another man.

All hope isn't lost yet for those who pursued beauty and curves and all other vain things. We can still pray that our wives would learn to truly fall in love with us and it is very possible. Sadly, most women are only passing out time in our houses. Including you. Yes You.

Kindly stay tuned for the next episode, Part 3.

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