REQUEST TO BE A MEMBER OF COMMITTEE OF FRIENDS FOR WEDDING PLANNING.
"It is my privilege and honour to select you as one of the honourable members of the Committee of Friends set up to assist in organising and planning my forthcoming wedding ceremonies which will hold on .../10/2021 and .../10/2021. The Committee will hold her meeting on 28/08/2021. Venue: ... . Time: 3:00pm. Thanks and may God bless you.
Barr..."
RESPONSE/OPINION BY UDEMS:
Congratulations. Thank you for offering me the privilege of being a member of your committee of friends for (your) wedding planning.
A FEW QUESTIONS ARISE:
What do you need a committee of friends for; can't you do without it? Must you spend much money to wed? Why would you organize an elaborate wedding? Is such a mandatory condition precedent to a successful or fruitful marriage? Is such any sign of love for your spouse-to-be? How? Are you planning a marriage or a society show?
Please, I will attend your wedding only if you're planning a moderate ceremony to mark the beginning of your marital life. I will not join to plan an unnecessary society-show under the guise of wedding.
MY ADVICE:
Take your people and a few friends, go and perform all marriage rites in line with relevant custom. Thereafter, take your wife and just a few people (or as many as want to come to the church/registry) to your Priest or Pastor or other Officiating Personnel, and let them bless your union in the usual way, to signify you're now fully married. Outside this, I do not support, and as such will not be party to, any waste of scarce resources in the name of an elaborate wedding; such thoughtlessness extravagance has plunged many a new couple into debt crises in the earliest stages of their marriage, resulting (more often than not) in excruciating experiences and had-I-known.
My brother, please save all the money you want to waste on planning and executing an elaborate wedding and channel same into this other project, which is much more important and rewarding (an elaborate wedding is wholly unimportant): taking care of your wife and family and children, after marriage, to make them happy and comfortable.
FURTHER ADVICE:
Take these from me:
1 Don't borrow any money because you want to wed; you might live to regret it. Organize and execute a moderate ceremony instead, and go on with your life, happily. No one has ever been remembered or given a national honour on account of the elaborateness of his "wedding".
2. Don't empty or jeopardize your bank account or earnings because of "wedding". You may thereafter not be happy you did.
3. If you have too much money to throw around, please don't waste it on an elaborate or society wedding; it's unnecessary, unrewarding, unimportant; it's a mere play-to-the-crowd. Find the less-privileged or underprivileged around you and help them; it's more rewarding and dignifying. There are many around you, who are ill and can't get proper medication or are not able to eat or to pay their school fees, etc, for lack of money. They need your help. You may even raise a Committee of Friends to raise money to help the less-privileged around you, as a way of marking your wedding. Recently, one man (his name is Emeka Ngige, SAN) constituted a committee of friends to raise money to fund some projects in the Nigerian Law School as a way to mark his own birthday 2021. So much money was raised and I am aware this is now being applied to solve some of the infrastructural deficits in the institution. Imagine if a few other Nigerians could emulate his example! What a shining example! What a sensible way to celebrate birthday, instead of flying 300 Nigerians to Dubai to celebrate a birthday.
Wishing you the best as you join us in this tough but necessary, enjoyable and fulfilling (marital) journey. May yours be most fruitful and prosperous.
Thank you, again.
I remain your brother and friend,
Sylvester Udemezue (udems)
08109024556
(25/08/2021).
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