BEFORE YOU KILL YOUR SPOUSE, READ THIS | Bisi Adewale

Now that we don’t know who is more likely a man or a woman to kill his or her spouse because it now looks like a competition. I think we need to discuss this in its context.

Every day, the news beat is awash with the news of a man killing his wife or a woman killing her husband. Women are getting more daring by the day; perhaps they want to change the old narrative of walker sex as they turn everything in the house into weapons. Frying pans, pestles, turning spatula, etc are very handy for attacking their husbands. 

A wife used a kitchen knife meant for cutting meat to slice her husband's genitals. Could you believe that this woman forced her husband to hold his genitals as blood gushed out from his intestine like water? The bitter wife did not see her husband as a man but as an animal that should die a slow and painful death.

Another woman hired a killer to help in murdering her cheating husband at their home in Osogbo. She cooked for her husband, had sex with him, and made him sleep off (she confessed she had sex with him to make him very weak and sleep quickly). As her husband was fast asleep, she brought in the killer who suffocated her husband with a pillow while she held his legs strongly so the killer could do his job easily.

A man killed his young wife out of anger. He suspected her of cheating on him. He threw her into the garden from the second floor just to make people believe she fell by accident.

Sanda has just been sentenced to death for killing her husband in Abuja. She stabbed him seventeen times, to be sure he was very dead maybe.

Yewande Oyediran, a lawyer, killed her husband in Ibadan a few months ago. 

Akolade Arowolo who killed his banker wife and was sentenced to death by a Lagos State High Court is still awaiting his day in the Court of Appeal. 

Lekan Sonde who killed his wife in Egbeda is waiting for the hangman to come calling.

Fresh in our memory is the Abule Egba Hotel owner saga, who was killed in January 2022 by his spouse, as if it was a new year's gift by his wife, on the account that he impregnated another woman. The man did not live to tell the world his side of the story before he was sent packing from this world by his spouse.                                         

I remembered in one of our visits to the prison years ago, we met a young lady and asked what brought her to Suleja prison. She then told us that her boyfriend's family came to visit during the holiday and decided to burn the man's wife and three children because the man never told her he was married.             

With all these killings and gory sights, we need to ask ourselves, "What has come over us? Where did we get it wrong? We were not like this before, what is happening? Are human lives not sacred again? When will the killing by supposed lovers come to an end?" Again, if I may ask if a spouse will not hesitate to kill each other, where is the love?

BEFORE YOU KILL YOUR SPOUSE, LISTEN TO ME.
Life is so precious, you can’t give it, you are not permitted to take it. No matter your reasons for it, as soon as you take a life or become violent, you will be the guilty one and the law will take its course against you.

WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO LOSE IF YOU KILL.
You have many things to lose by becoming violent in your marriage. Once it leads to death or bodily harm, the whole nation will be against you. It will be you against the state. You are likely going to be killed or sentenced to life imprisonment if you kill your spouse.

Before you are sentenced in court and executed, you would have spent some years in solitary confinement in the prison yard. All those who are hailing you now will not be with you. They will be against you for a fact. You will be on your own to face your foolishness alone.

As soon as you are sentenced to death, you will be taken to a condemned criminal cell. It is the most terrible place anybody can ever be. You will live in fear of the hangman for the rest of your life. You won’t know the day he will come but you know he is coming for sure.

The person's blood, your victim will then be in your hands and your neck forever. What a big burden to bear. It will be on record that you are a killer, a murderer!

Your children will carry this stigma all the days of their lives. If your children's potential in-laws get to know their background, they may ensure that their children do not marry your children. Your children are going to live the rest of their lives in agony.

If you kill your spouse, your children will end up losing both parents as the state will kill a killer.

Don’t allow anger, bitterness, and resentment to take the better of you. Don’t allow jealousy to dictate your life. Don't permit hurt to stay in your life and ruin your destiny.

Soon, anger will disappear when blood begins to gush out while your spouse is on the floor and a bloody knife is in your hands. The police will come calling and handcuff your hands which will be your new wristwatch as your life turns from noon to midnight. The dead will be better than you as he or she will have a place of rest and the sympathy of people. But you will not have the privilege of rest or peace of mind. No!

When you kill, you murder sleep and joy. People's curses will go with you as you step on the blood of the innocent soul that will be crying for vengeance.

Friends will desert you, your family will disown you, and you will stand alone as a lawyer makes lots of money from your foolishness before they stop calling when they see you to the hangman. Most lawyers won’t show up to see you off to the hangman's workshop as you won’t live to pay them for that service. You know lawyers and fees, so you are on your own. Only a priest who you'd meet for the first and only time will be called to lead you on the journey your stupidity and volatility ignited.

Regret, regret, and regret will be your companion as the rope snuffs out your precious life from you because of your lack of discretion.

Nothing, I mean nothing is worth the life of anybody. Don’t take it because you will not have a hiding place, the law will call on you.

Read, this over again, and never go near your kitchen when you are angry. Don’t use the kitchen tools as your ballistic missile to destroy someone you once said you loved.

When marriage is hurting, talk to experts who will help you to handle the situation. Your F. F. F will not be helpful at this time. They will fuel the fire more. F. F. F means Family Members, Friends, and Fans.

Look for help in the right quarters before you end up killing somebody and hurting yourself. If you are being hurt and feeling murderous, speak out now and seek help. If your spouse is hurting you deeply, seek help, not weapons.                                             
Good if you can keep this piece and read it from time to time to serve as a constant reminder, that you have no right to take someone's life let alone your spouse's because you will get caught and the end cannot and will not justify the means.

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